Prince William turns 31 today. Hurrah-rah-rah! Happy birthday, Wills! But what with a birth to plan, two nurseries to decorate and the small task of baby-proofing the whole of Kensington Palace on her to-do list, we’re guessing Kate Middleton might be busy and may have left her present buying to the last minute. Luckily, we’re here to lend the Duchess of Cambridge a helping hand with some handy ideas on what to get the second in line to the throne for his big day…
1. Kanye West‘s new album, Yeezus. So he knows what all the fuss is about and can be down with the kids.
2. Slippers. Not exactly sexy but we’re 100% sure their pooch, Lupo, would have gnawed though his favourtie pair.
3. Aqua Zorbing. What better way to make a 31-year-old feel young again? Strap him into a giant hamster ball, half fill it with water then push him down a really steep hill. Prince Harry would definitely be up for it.
4. George Clooney. He knows his coffee. Maybe, if we ask nicely, he’ll do a special delivery of one of those super posh Nespresso machines. The caffeine fixes will help Prince William though the night feeds, after all.
5. Miracle-Gro. Once you push past the 30 mark, you start to really appreciate horticulture. We can see Wills thoroughly enjoying growing his own asparagus.
7. A Twitter and Instagram account. We want a live feed from that delivery room in St Mary’s Hospital. They are the ‘modern Royals’ after all.
8. A lock-in at Whisky Mist. His mate Guy Pelly owns the place and we’re sure it’s the last chance he’ll get to have a ‘lads night’ of banter, port and whisky before HRH baby arrives.
9. A years supply of Berocca. Because it’ll make him, him… but on a really good day. (Handy for the ‘lads night’ hangover too).
10. A bouncy castle. Way more fun than Windsor’s boring old stone version.
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