There’s still an air of stigma and cynicism surrounding open relationships in 2016. Despite frequent portrayals in movies and TV of analogues like ‘friends with benefits’ and ‘casual flings’, the reality of not being tied down to one person still causes a ruckus among quite a lot of people.
In a time where sexual fluidity is celebrated not scorned, open relationships are becoming more common among more experienced people that need some extra juice for their relationship.
Young people, they’ll probably never work for.
You need maturity and security to pull off something like this, hence why 99.999% of FWB situations fall apart… young people think they’re liberal with their affection but they’re all just raging balls of insecurity and hormones.
Andrea Syrtash is a full-time relationship expert and author of Cheat On Your Husband (With Your Husband), gave a great interview that highlighted how to make open relationships work.
So let’s get everyone on the same page. An open relationship is a marriage of partnership “in which the two people involved have agreed to engage in a romantic and/or intimate relationship outside of their primary romantic relationship.” It’s hardly rocket science…
“It’s important to already have clear communication, respect and trust as the foundation of your relationship before broaching this”. How can you expect your partner to trust you with this situation if you can’t trust them, after all, you’re still a team, jealously and hurt feelings will destroy the whole set-up.
You need to know you won’t let jealously get the better of you. Open relationships are cool but it’s super important to remember that they’re not for everyone.
“Check in with yourself and gauge your genuine openness or comfort level,” Syrtash says.
“Ask your partner why this is of interest and express any concerns or questions. Also, consider doing a cost-benefit analysis. What’s it costing you to try this arrangement? What’s it costing you not to?”
Think about the romantic economics, will you be able to return to normalcy if it doesn’t work out?
Set some ground rules. A lot of couples have to assert a degree of separation so “nobody we know” or “three steps apart from me”. As with everything in all relationships, the call is 100% yours. Do what you’ve got to do, society be damned!