Proof That Having A January Birthday Sucks

January is not a fun month. Christmas is over, it’s cold, and life is generally just a bit drab.

But if you think you’re feeling less-than-sprightly right now, why don’t you spare a thought for those poor souls whose birthdays fall in January… Because really, there’s NOTHING worse.

Here is the definitive proof that having a January birthday sucks.

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1) You don’t look good in any photos

Thanks, post-Christmas bloat.

2) EVERYONE is on dry January

There goes your birthday cocktails.


3) EVERYONE is on a diet

…Oh, and the pizza party too.

4) EVERYONE is depressed/hating life

Happy birthday to me.


5) All of your friends are broke

So if you were planning on doing anything fancy, don’t. Nando’s it is then.

6) You get crap presents

Presents that are either a) unwanted Christmas gifts, or b) have been blatantly bought in the sale. Real thoughtful.

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7) Your parents use the old ‘combined’ present excuse

‘It’s your Christmas and Birthday present!’ Uh, if my birthday was in JUNE this wouldn’t happen, guys.

8) The weather is always terrible

No sun-soaked outdoor gazebo parties for you, pal.


9) You feel guilty asking anyone to do anything in the bleakest month

Somehow, you end up feeling bad about your inconvenient birthday.

10) Your mates just aren’t in the mood

Because of Christmas over-indulgence, most people are ‘feeling fat’ or have stinking colds – hence, don’t want to do anything. Cheers lads.

11) Everyone is waiting for January to be over…

Not great if your birthday is happening.