Ok so it looks like summer is FINALLY here (I don’t want to jinx it, so don’t quote me on that). And while we’ve finally got a legitimate excuse to wear our fave slip dress and Birkenstocks, with the heat comes a whole host of issues.
Like for starters, when is someone going to make some heat-proof make up? We are seriously struggling over here. And also we may as well just accept that our hair is going to look absolutely terrible from the get go. I mean, daytime dates? We’d rather give away our brand new Urban decay palette. Yes, it’s what we’ve all been waiting for but, we’re British and you know we love a good moan…
1. It’s 27 degrees wohooo sunbathing in the park here I come. Better make sure I slap on the factor 30, I don’t want to look like a piece of vintage leather by the time I’m 40.
2. Protection done, time to do my makeup. Um why does my foundation look like I’ve pre mixed it with lard and why is no amount of powder doing anything about it? We’ve got smart phones but not a sun cream that doesn’t leave me looking like a grease ball. EUGH.
3. Lets just quickly blow dry my hair, I think I’ll wear a skirt and this cute vest top. Time to hit the road.
4. I’ve been outside for approximately 30 seconds and my upper lip could already sink the titanic. Brilliant.
5. Time to hop on the tube. I’m almost certain that the temperature on the Central Line isn’t fit to transport cattle in.
6. Get near a window, the makeup is slowly dripping off your face.
7. LOL, actually what makeup. Was there any point in me putting any foundation on this morning?
8. I can feel those baby hairs curling up around my hairline. Give. Me. A Break.
9. A skirt was a great choice, apart from the fact that I feel like I am stuck to this seat. All you people in jeans have a death wish.
10. Left the house with silky smooth hair, currently look like a scarecrow.
11. Necessary toilet stop, aaaaand my mascara is half way down my face. I don’t recall watching the Notebook on my journey?
12. Finally outside, forgot what breathing air felt like. Time to bask in this glorious weather.
13. Ten minutes of bathing and my chest and shoulders are pinker than a rare steak.
14. The strappy top was a mistake, my tan lines are atrocious.
15. It’s time to give up the dream, tie your hair up for goodness sake.
16. This must be what my bacon feels like when I put it in the grill.
17. Yeah, do you know what, I ‘m done, time to head to the nearest shop with aircon. I hate heat waves.