Nicole Scherzinger is one of those celebrities who we imagine constantly surrounded by friends, family and friends of friends of family. But while the charismatic X Factor judge has won over everybody from Sharon Osbourne to Simon Cowell, Nicole has exclusively confessed to LOOK that as soon as the cameras stop rolling, it’s been taking up a a lot of inner strength to hold it together…
“I’m being brave right now because I’m here alone, all my friends and family are all back home,” she confided exclusively to us. “[Being brave] is the story of my life.”
While Nicole has been based in the UK for previous series of the X Factor, this is the first year she’s been single after splitting from her boyfriend of five years, British Formula One champion Lewis Hamilton, back in July.
Nicole described the split as a “dark moment” which even led to her breaking down in tears during several of the contestants’ auditions. “It has been a tough year”, the former Pussycat Doll admitted. “I was obviously going through some stuff internally.”
Not that she’s going to let that get her down permanently, of course. “My work keeps me busy,” Nicole explains when we ask her how she copes with the loneliness. “And when I’m not working, I’m in the studio recording.”
It’s a tried and tested method, but it doesn’t seem to make things any easier in the long run. “I don’t have anyone here,” she confessed earlier in the summer. “My publicist is my closest friend.” So close, in fact, that Nicole even went on to reveal that she takes her on dinner dates around London, just so she doesn’t have to eat alone.
Now it looks like the added pressure on Nicole to succeed in the X Factor ( she did win in her debut year, after all) could be making things even worse. And with the live shows taking over her weekends and rehearsals every day, Nicole hasn’t got a chance to find her feet – or any friends – in the process.
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“I puke,” she tells us, revealing how stressed she gets about the live stages of the show. “I get really nervous. I’d much rather be singing on stage than speaking every night, so I go for a run before the shows to clear my head, and I say a prayer.”
Thankfully, despite the nerves and bouts of sadness, Nicole is determined to keep her spirits up. “I love my work,” she explains. “I love being here… I’m on a new adventure.” Good to hear it, Nic.
By Corinne Redfern and Emma Hunt