If you haven’t seen Magic Mike XXL yet, it comes highly recommended by us.
Whether you’ve seen the first one or not, it really does not matter. It’s safe to say that this new offering is a stripathon of all different kinds of proportions – ahem – and it’s in a league of its very own.
God. Bless. America.
When we were getting all hot and bothered in our cinema seats, it really got us thinking. We won’t go into too much detail about all of those thoughts, because, you know, working hours. But one thing that just kept on cropping up – oh dear – is just how convenient it would be to date a male stripper.
And not just any male stripper we might add, but a Magic Mike of our very own.
Unless Channing Tatum happens to want to make himself available to us, that is… We can dream, right?
1. He’s got the moves
The hips. The body popping. The torso wave.
Together you’ll be the centre of attention on any night out. He won’t dream of refusing to dance with you at your best friend’s wedding.
And, come on, if he moves like that on a dance floor… Need we say more?
2. You’ll be as light as a feather to him
If he can pick you up when you’re sitting on a chair, he’ll have no problems throwing you around (in a good way mind) in any other setting.
3. You won’t need to worry about introducing him to the parents
Your mum will swoon like a school girl. And your dad will want to swap workout tips (after the mandatory grilling is out of the way, obvs).
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4. He’ll turn even the dullest of scenarios into a fun-loving spectacle
Whether it’s a long ass drive to your cousin’s engagement party, or a stop off at the petrol garage, he’ll always be ready to entertain.
Plenty of stories to tell the grandkids then, eh?
5. He’ll be sensitive
Having worked his whole life surrounded by women, he’ll know what you want even before you do.
Now. Where to find him?
By Laura Jane Turner
Images: Warner Bros