11 Agonising Stages Of The Post-Christmas Blues

It’s hard to believe that Christmas has now come and gone. You’ve been building up to it since November 1st then BAM! After a full-on food coma and watching Downton Abbey with your Gran snoozing in the armchair, it’s over. Done. Finito. And it sucks. The only comfort? Knowing you’re not alone in your melancholy.

So, if you’re feeling the post-Christmas blues just as bad as we are, you’ll know these Boxing Day woes all to well. Now, excuse us while we cry in

1. When you wake up and the magic is GONE

The first morning spent without a stocking filled with teeny, tiny presents is a slap in the face. End of.

2. As you rise to your feet, you feel sick at the thought of how much chocolate you consumed in the last 24 hours

SO. MANY. FERRERO ROCHERS.

3. You muster the courage go downstairs/into the living room and it looks like a bar brawl’s taken place

Baubles are smashed, turkey’s trodden into the carpet and there are more red wine rings on the table than you can count. FFS.

4. You can’t bring yourself to turn on the Christmas tree lights…

The sharp sting of reality stops you in your tracks.

5. Realising there’s no point in wearing your ‘fancy’ clothes

Because no one gives a crap what you wear on a ‘regular’ day.

6. You develop a hatred for fairisle prints/Christmas jumpers/novelty socks

I can’t stand this incessant taunting any longer.

7. Festive films on TV just feel wrong

‘It’s been and gone, people’, you proclaim whilst sobbing…

8. You go to the fridge to find something to eat and the gravy skin makes you feel queasy

I CAN’T EVEN.

9. You make it to lunchtime, and you realise it’s those stinky leftovers for the rest of the day

Anyone keen for a Domino’s?

10. Having an afternoon nap seems like the only way to get through this terror

My bed is my bae.

11. Then you wake, and you realise you still haven’t sorted your NYE outfit

To the awful, awful sales!

Why can’t every day be Christmas Day?