The 9 Terrible Stages Of Being Hangry

When emotion and hunger meet, it’s not a pretty sight.

We’ve all been there. You miss your alarm and wake up late, meaning no time for your cereal before work. You arrive at the office HANGRY.

Or maybe it’s the weekend. You’ve been dragged out shopping by your boyfriend and it’s only by 11am that you realise you’ve only had a coffee and nothing to eat, oh, and you’re still shopping… Suddenly you are very, very HANGRY.

There are so many reasons we get hangry, but the results are the same.

The rage hits, we say and do things we don’t mean, we scream and shout and throw tantrums and don’t even recognise ourselves until… Pizza.

And then there’s calm. Here are the 9 stages of being hangry.

1. You’re totally fine. And then suddenly… THE HANGER HITS.

Carbs. Carbs. I need carbs. Only gum? Gum will do. Give me gum.

2. Your boyfriend asks you if you’re okay.

You want to hit him. You scream at him for stepping on your toe and then trying to touch your hair. You have never hated someone more.


Miley Cyrus Miley Cyrus animated GIF

3. You desperately seek out the nearest eating establishment.

Okay, okay. Approximately how long would it take me to reach the nearest Starbucks? Can I get two paninis? And a muffin? And almonds? I’m SO HUNGRY I’LL DEFINITELY NEED TWO OF EVERYTHING.



4. You decide you aren’t going to make it. 

You’ve literally got no sugar in your blood. You feel faint. If you don’t eat within the next three seconds, you think this could be it. *Collapses dramatically on the floor and rolls onto stomach*

5. You find a spare bar of dark chocolate in your bag.

OMG! Emergency eating commences. You stuff the whole thing in your mouth and ride the blissful sugar high for 20 minute. You then feel sick inside.

6.
Now you need real food. Good food. YOU’VE REACHED A RESTAURANT. Everything’s okay.

DID YOU REALLY JUST PUSH IN FRONT ME IN THE QUEUE? DO YOU KNOW WHAT I’VE BEEN THROUGH TO GET HERE???



7.
Everyone else gets served before you

Where is your food? Did they forget your food? NO I DON’T WANT A BITE OF YOURS I JUST WANT MY CHEESEBURGER. Why is the world against you??



8. You cannot shovel that food in your mouth fast enough

There’s just not enough time. Need. To. Cure. Hanger. Why won’t the food go in faster?

9. Your want to vomit

Oh. You filled up on the chocolate/bread basket. And those two starters. And the side of chips. You can’t possibly eat another bite. Dinner = ruined. Forget the ‘H’, you’re now just angry. DAMN YOU, HANGER!