Emily Ratajkowski has penned a really powerful letter. And it’s all about female sexuality.
You may know her as the Blurred Lines model who boasts an Angelina pout and the most impossibly sexy body in the world, but did you know that she’s also a pretty amazing wordsmith?
In a new essay, circulated within Lena Dunham’s Lenny newsletter, Emily talks about the way women are still judged for being ‘too’ sexy, and explains that she’s done with females having to deal with it.
‘Teachers, friends, adults, boyfriends were the ones to make me feel uncomfortable or guilty about my developing sexuality’, the model begins.
Speaking of her time as a 13-year-old, Emily recalls a concerned family member blatantly ‘sobbing’ to her parents because her outfit in a school play (she had double D boobs at this point) apparently distracted some of the men in the audience.
Emily explains how she was then warned to ‘keep a low profile’ and ‘hide out’ whilst she grew into her body.’
‘Their comments felt much more personal and thus landed that much harder,’ Ratajkowski writes. ‘I was still figuring out how to put a tampon in, never mind how to understand some of the more complicated aspects of womanhood.’
Now, the Gone Girl actress understands her body, and refuses to apologise for coming across as a sexually liberated woman.
‘To me, ‘sexy’ is a kind of beauty, a kind of self-expression, one that is to be celebrated, one that is wonderfully female,’ Emily writes, before asking an important question.
‘Why does the implication have to be that sex is a thing men get to take from women and women give up?’
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Stating that she doesn’t want young girls to have the same complicated relationship with their body and sexuality as she was forced to experience, Emily continues.
‘Most adolescent women are introduced to ‘sexy’ women through porn or Photoshopped images of celebrities. Is that the only example of a sexual woman we will provide to the young women of our culture? Where can girls look to see women who find empowerment in deciding when and how to be or feel sexual?’
‘I refuse to live in this world of shame and silent apologies,’ she ends. ‘Life cannot be dictated by the perceptions of others, and I wish the world had made it clear to me that people’s reactions to my sexuality were not my problems, they were theirs.’
‘Honouring our sexuality as women is a messy, messy business, but if we don’t try, what do we become?’ she ends.
Now that‘s what we call food for thought.