Too many lols
Guys, listen up – we have a sticky situation. Literally.
Waxing slash ripping the hairs from your body isn’t exactly the first thing on our list of things to do. But we’ve all been there – where a holiday or night on the pull is around the corner and a bit of, well, maintenance is needed.
We’ve all heard our fair share of botched hair removal experiences by now. For us, we prefer to keep those intimate deets on the DL.
However, poor Hannah Scorer, a victim of (most probably) the worst hair removal nightmare of all time, took to Facebook to share her quite catastrophic story. And it’s honestly too funny.
Here’s what happened…
Oblivious as ever, instead of booking in a professional waxing sesh, Hannah chose to save some dollar. Smart, you’d think. Well the poor girl was so wrong…She took a trip to Boots to pick up a pack of their own-brand Smooth Care wax strips.
This is where everything went downhill.
Posting on Boots Facebook page which has since gone viral, Hannah begins by claiming ‘candle wax’ and ‘wax crayons’ could have done a better job.
Boots, we need to have a word. These are, categorically, the worst wax strips in the world. I haven’t tried all the other wax strips, but I’m confident I don’t need to. That’s how bad these are….
After going through the dreaded pain of pulling off a wax strip, seeing your smooth baby’s bum skin makes it almost worth it. But that was not the case in this instance…
Hannah went on to explain what she was unfortunate enough to witness on her nether regions instead:
“All the hair I’d just tried to take off not even slightly detached from its follicles. Except now, matted firmly into the hair was a thick layer of wax. Have you touched that wax when it becomes separated from its strip? It is so sticky it could have held together the original Sugarbabes line-up. My bikini line was like the dancefloor of a really questionable club at 3am.”
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Well, at least the girl’s humour is still intact. Not sure we can say the same about her V-jay hairs.
Happy with an idea to salvage the situation, Hannah remembered the wax residue removing wipes included in the box of wax strips. Phew, problem solved. Not quite…
“I took one of the wipes and started trying to rub of the wax/glue/melted Push Pop hybrid. However, instead of rescuing my skin, the wipe becomes trapped and bits of it tear off and firmly adhere to my waxy, furry skin, like a series of tiny surrender flags.”
Initially, showering, exfoliating and using ‘a good old-fashioned razor’ didn’t budge the wax either, instead ‘blunting the razor’.
But finally, good news – Hannah wrote: ‘with repeated exfoliation and the use of a large amount of very expensive oil I usually save for special occasions and a replacement razor blade, I manage to finish the job the wax strips didn’t really start.’
And the worst thing yet – during that mayhem, Hannah was trying to get ready for a DATE.
Even after everything she went through, Hannah was still kind enough to suggest a rebranding idea to Boots, ‘gift them to the construction industry as an alternative to cement. Or pass them on to local councils looking for some anti-climb paint’.
After all that traumatic prep, we really hope the date went well…
By Sammie Liu